The Most Anticipated Movies of 2012
If you’re family is like mine, you probably got one for Christmas. I have an aunt who has given on to me every year since I was seven. Each time I open the wrapping paper and feign surprise, as if my present could have been anything else. The first few times she gave me this turd of a gift, I hung it dutifully on my wall for the entire year. Each time I looked at it, I would wonder how Chocolate Labradors or Monster Trucks define me as a person (News Flash: They don’t). Now, as soon as she leaves the room, I throw my gift right in the trash without even a modicum of guilt. Still don’t know what I’m talking about?
Is there a cheaper gift on the planet than 12 sheets of paper meant to help you remember what day it is AND how majestic horses can look when photographed in the mountains? I think not. Whether it’s a 12-month compilation of World War II planes in your Grandfather’s study or the much dirtier version you might find in your local auto body shop, calendars are not for everybody. With that said, I’m going to attempt to break the mold here (because I didn’t get you anything for Christmas). I give you the Most Anticipated Movies of 2012 Calendar. I hope this ends up on your wall, but if it doesn’t, I’ll understand.