By Joan Alperin Schwartz: 'Transformers - Dark Of The Moon' presented in 3D is directed by Michael Bay.
First, I'll start with the good stuff. And yes, there is 'good stuff'. In fact, I think this is the best 'Transformers' of the series...which may or may not be saying much...depending on how you felt about the other two.
Here it goes...In no particular order...What I liked about this film...
1) The backstory...We find out from archival news footage that President Kennedy didn't send our astronauts to the Moon just to take a few steps for Mankind, but to investigate an alien space ship that had crashed landed there in the 1960's.
FYI...When the Autobots were losing their war with the Deceptiicons, Sentinal Prime (the Autobots leader) attempted to launch a space craft (The Arc) filled with technology that would have saved his people. Instead, the ship crashed on the Moon and the Autobots were forced to flee to Earth. Got all that?
2) The screenplay, written by Ehren Kruger, shows us how the Autobots were responsible for many world events...Guess who really tracked down and killed Osama Ben Laden? And who was really responsible for the Chernobyl meltdown? Could it have anything to do with experimenting on alien technology???
3) Love the Autobots...Bumblebee, Ratchet, Ironhide, Sideswipe and Optimus Prime are all back. The evil Deceptiicons...including the beaten down Megatron and the newest villian, Shockwave...very cool. The storyline of these two enemies, in my opinion, is the most exciting and entertaining part of this movie.
4) Frances McDormand as Charlotte Mearing, the no nonsense Defense Department Commander, and John Turturro (Former CIA Agent, Simmons) definitely belong in this column. Their bantering back and forth with each other is fun and definitely not annoying.
Now for the 'bad stuff'
1) Shia LaBeof (Sam Witwicky)spends the whole film wearing one facial expression that conveys one emotion...Anger...How do we know he's angry?...He whines...Constantly...Sam whines about not finding a job...Sam whines when he gets a job. He whines about not being able to play with his Transformer buddies and be a part of the 'action'. Sam whines that he saved the world...twice...He whines that he got a medal from President Obama and still...no one realizes how important he is.
2) Sam's pouty-lip girlfriend, Carly(supermodel Rosie Huntington-Whitley) who makes Megan Fox seem like Meryl Streep...Seriously...A guy like Sam could never get a girl as hot and as plastic as Carly. Not because of his looks...but because he constantly WHINES!!!
3) I don't think Michael Bay has ever heard the saying 'More Is Less'. The last 60 minutes of the film is the destruction of Chicago...The stunts, the action, the battles are great to watch...at first. But they go on and on and on. It all becomes one big mechanical blur. Maybe Mr. Bay thinks we, the audience, aren't smart enough to get it the first time...or the second...or the third...or the...
The 'Two Jews On Film' have carried on their tradition of disagreeing. Check out our video review and see our bagel rating.
'Transformers Dark Of The Moon' opens in theaters, Wednesday, June 29, 2011.