I love being surprised.  The ruckus looking grindhouse throwback "The Baytown Outlaws" does deliver on it’s trailer promise to provide guns, gals and good lines galore.  But what it also contains is something hidden from the flash and dash crowd watching said trailers just looking to get the skinny in a jiffy.  It’s something you wouldn’t expect from a film with fetching female assassins, muscle bound meatheads and a do-gooder with a kick ass body – heart.

The Oodie Brothers are a seriously surly gang of rednecks from the wrong side of the tracks, but the thing they do best is wreaking havoc.  In fact Brick (the charismatic one!), Lincoln (the big one!) and McQueen (the good looking one!) have made such a name out of causing trouble, that someone finally comes calling looking to acquire their services.  Her name is Celeste and she’s looking to reclaim her godson Rob from her vicious ex-husband Carlos.  At first the brothers balk at such a petty request, but after Celeste dumps a wad of bills in their lap, the trio decide to take on the task.  However things get a little complicated along the way...

To reveal some of the finer story devices that elevate "The Baytown Outlaws" from simple T&A fare would be a crime, but let’s jut say don’t judge a book by it’s cover.  There are some real touching moments amongst the mayhem and it adds greatly to the already lush allure of the flick.  Not that sex and violence isn’t represented here – the luscious and lethal Flame Bangers girl gang sees to that – but the mighty menu here has a lot of choices.  Good performances?  The Oodie Bros. themselves (Daniel Cudmore, Travis Fimmel and especially Clayne Crawford!) provide incredibly layered work amidst playing a group of simple hicks.  Believable bad guy?  Billy Bob Thornton combines the bitterness of his character in "Faster" with the crass of "Bad Santa" for a tasty turn here.  Action and violence that’s savory?  Guns, fistfights, and even some bows & arrow action rounds out this frenetic fest.  Credible actors?  How about a saucy yet sexy turn by Eva 'you're so hot' Longoria and an always solid Andre Braugher.  (There’s even a pinch of comedy via perfectly cast Michael “Special” Rapaport!)  Bottom line - there’s something for everyone in "The Baytown Outlaws."

I admit do get giddy when I see a movie ride that looks to be trip worth taking, but what is so special about "The Baytown Outlaws" is what’s not in the brochure.  Sin, sex and sass in the right hands are always cause to celebrate, but add in sweetness, sensitivity and sentimentality and you’ve got a five-star vacation to die for.




Title: "The Baytown Outlaws"

Stars: 5

Genre: Action/Drama

Cast: Eva Longoria, Billy Bob Thornton, Clayne Crawford

Director: Barry Battles

Rating: R

Running Time: 98 Minutes

Release Company: Phase 4 Films

Website: http://www.baytownoutlaws.com