Nicki Minaj revealed that one of her defense mechanisms is getting crazy, which is why she exploded at Mariah Carey in an infamous American Idol video.

While talking to Ellen DeGeneres on her show, Minaj said she didn't believe all of the rumors over Carey being furious about her hiring. However, it didn't take long for Minaj to feel "a little bit of the shade."

Nicki responded to Carey by getting "crazy," telling Ellen, "I just kind of overcompensated by being crazier. If you know somebody maybe doesn’t like you, now you’re going to really go in... it’s like a defense mechanism, it’s really that your feelings are hurt, and you can’t believe, so you just compensate by being crazy."

That said, Nicki is adamant that things have since celared up with the fellow singer. "I cannot hold a grudge against Mariah Carey. I’ve looked up to her for so many years."

Still, Minaj is worried that her crazy side may come out again - and it may be on live television. "I’m not looking forward to live shows... I cannot trust myself. If there’s a comment being made... I don’t want to look like a crazy psycho again."