Super Mario Bros.
SMB is the friend that comes over and destroys the HDTV the first time he plays Wii Bowling. Super Mario Bros. not only failed spectacularly, it hindered every movie based on a video game after it because of its example. The game never really had any grounding in reality, with mushrooms that make you grow and turtles in clouds that throw spiky reptiles. So to try and insert such preposterous themes into a realistic backdrop was a disastrous decision.

Double Dragon
While a few contend this film may be so bad it’s good, in reality it’s just horrendous. Featuring Robert Patrick with frosted white tips and a dystopian Los Angeles of 2007 (those were the days), it’s hard to find one good thing about Double Dragon - other than the fact that you now know where the Chairman from Iron Chef America got his first paycheck.

Street Fighter
For those not in the know, Guile is an all-American Army badass in the Street Fighter video games series. In the movie, he is portrayed by Jean-Claude Van Damme, who could not imitate an American accent if his life depended on it. Thus, we have an American soldier with a Belgian accent. Unfortunately, the last time we got to see Raul Julia on the big screen was in this piece of junk.

Mortal Kombat: Annihilation
This movie is so bad that Linden Ashby made sure his character was killed off in the first 10 minutes. After all, he had to do projects like Murder She Purred.

Steps to Mortal Kombat: Annihilation:
1. Replace hottie Bridgette Wilson with some no-name who doesn’t look anything like her.
2. Replace Christopher Lambert with James Remar.
3. Use really bad effects (including a final battle wherein the combatants turn into poorly-animated monsters) and dialogue that belongs in an adult film.

Wing Commander
Scooby Doo... in... SPACE! Two fifths of The Gang appears in this sci-fi flop, based on a series known for using actual actors in filmed cut scenes. Wing Commander IV: The Price of Freedom featured Mark Hamill, Malcolm Mcdowell, and John Rhys-Davies – and it was better than this movie! It also didn’t help that the enemy aliens were giant cats: any scene featuring them were unintentionally hilarious gut-busters.

Max Payne
This film lost our support as soon as Mark Wahlberg was cast. There’s this guy named Dean Winters, and he IS Max Payne looks-wise. The film was also cut heavily to net a PG-13 rating, a disappointment to fans of the gritty, bloody Mature-rated game.

DOA: Dead or Alive
It’s very hard to make fighting games realistic in the cinema world: a dozen people jet set to a random island and fight for cash, all while hammering out various back stories than can be somehow solved by winning the tournament. At heart, the DOA series has a lot to do with sexy femmes and little else. That’s basically what is delivered in the film, although with a PG-13 rating, the sexuality and violence is toned down. Oh yeah, the acting sucks too.

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