This week we find Jim in his new, fancy office located directly across from Michael's office
. Dwight tries to ask Michael to sign his expense report. Michael tells Dwight he's only in charge of big picture things now and that Jim is now in charge of the day-to-day details items like expense reports. Dwight barges into Jim's office and demands he sign the expense report. Jim tells him he won't sign it until Dwight says, "Please."
Dwight storms back into Michael's office to file a complaint against Jim. Michael says he only handles big things. So Dwight says he wants to make a huge gigantic complaint about the tallest person in the office. Then he tells Michael about Jim not signing his expense report. Michael stops him and says no, then pushes him out of his office. Dwight goes to Jim to file a complaint. Jim gets out a clipboard and some paper. He asks Dwight when the incident took place. Dwight says, "One minute ago." Jim asks if Michael hit him. Dwight says no. Jim asks if he cried. Dwight says no. Jim says, "I'm writing: Held back tears." Dwight gets very upset and tries to disagree with Jim. Moments later Dwight is talking to camera in the conference room. He says the promotion should have been his. He wants to get Jim in a headlock and then slam him to the mat and do all kinds of wrestling moves on him and finally beat him and win $18,000 and get a chance at the title. He stands, yells, and raises his arms in victory. Then Erin walks into the conference room and says that Jim wants Dwight to keep it down and be quiet. Oh bitter defeat, the humiliation is tangible.
Michael wants to call everyone into the conference room for a very long meeting. So long, in fact, he advices people to, "bring a snack." Jim asks to see Michael in his office. Oscar tells camera that it's great having two managers. It makes the office run efficiently and smoothly. He points out how many times having two leaders is a benefit, as when countries have two presidents or a ship has two captains. He reminds us of how far the Catholic Church has come by having, "the Popes."
Jim thinks the meetings waste too much time and the employees need to be working. Michael decides to call Jim, Jimathy, then says that sounds weird and asks if he minds being called Jim. Jim says no. Michael says the meetings are helpful. Jim points out that the last meeting they spent the whole time talking about planets. Michael explains that the conversation began as a question of which toilet paper purchase to make and that led to the question of which planet relates to the body part involved with toilet paper and that lead to the discussion of planets in general and Michael really feels people learned something that day. Michael thinks everyone learned just how small we are in the Universe. He gives the example of napping. Someone goes to sleep when it's light out, they wake up and it's night and they wonder where that day went? Jim points out that these naps would only be taking place on weekends. Michael reluctantly agrees.
Pam stands in the kitchen debating whether or not to eat a donut. She's pregnant but she also wants to fit into her wedding dress. Ryan points out that it's a myth that women have to gain more than 9 pounds during a pregnancy. He points out several celebrities that actually lose weight while pregnant. Pam decides to ignore Ryan and instead talks to Phyllis. Phyllis asks if they've registered for gifts yet. Pam says they will register but they're accepting non-traditional gifts from off their registry as well. Phyllis gets very excited and tells her that she's giving them a birdhouse made out of a mailbox. Phyllis then says that although Pam knows what she's getting when she sees it she'll still be surprised. The horror!
Pam doesn't want to be tacky but all they really want is cash. Cold, hard and lots of it. They need help with the new baby on the way. Kevin asks if they're registered anywhere. She says not really. Kevin asks if it's okay if he writes her a check. She accepts. He says not to cash it until Monday. Pam asks camera if this is what she's come to? She feels as if she's becoming too materialistic then she notices her name on the check. Kevin made it out to "Mrs. Pam Halpert!" That's the first time she's seen it in writing.
Michael decides to have a small gathering of employees in his office and pretend it's not a meeting. Jim and Michael fight over whether or not they have equal power or not. Michael tries to establish his dominance over Jim. Michael decides to call David Wallace but before he can David calls them. David says they will not be able to give out cost of living raises to everyone in the office. He wants both managers to work things out between them over how the money will be distributed. Jim and Michael try to work out how to distribute the money. Jim writes a pro and con list. Michael stands in front of him and makes fun of him.
Jim says he's learned a few things about Michael over the years. He made a pie chart representing how Michael spends his time. The majority is spent procrastinating, slightly less time is spent distracting others from working and a small sliver of time is spent using critical thinking. Jim says he made the line bigger so people could see it.
Jim fights for his ideas to be heard. He insists that Michael allow him to make his presentation to the office staff and tell them the raises will be given to the sales staff in order to keep them happy. Michael chuckles and lets him. After Jim makes his announcement the office goes nuts. They attack him and ask if they have to sleep with him in order to get a raise. After Jim's verbal beating he decides to rewind and go back into the conference room to come up with a better plan. Michael covers for Jim with a bunch of non-sense phrases and runs back into the conference room.
Back in the conference room Jim tries to come up with a new system based on merit. He places photos of each of the employees on the conference room desk and places "beans of merit" on top of their faces. The people with the most beans will get raises.
It seemed like such a fool-proof plan until Dwight sneaks into the office and then allows everyone to see the "bean system." The office goes into a tizzy asking why certain people have more beans than others. Jim and Michael retreat into Jim's office to hide. Michael leaves then returns moments later with a "World's Best Boss" mug for Jim and one for himself. Jim asks what's in the mug. Michael says, "Gin." They take a sip and try to relax. Michael admits that he's happy to have Jim by his side. He used to have to make decisions like this all by himself. It's nice to have a partner for the tough times. They bond as the entire office yells at them through the door. Ah corporate America, where greed and the lust for power mate with bad manners to produce a love child of resentment and anger.
Next week is the big event everyone's been waiting for: Jim and Pam's wedding. Yea.
by Erin MacMillan-Ramirez
The Office stars: Steve Carell
/ John Krasinski
/ Jenna Fischer
/ Rainn Wilson
/ B.J. Novak
/ Melora Hardin
/ Mindy Kaling
/ Brian Baumgartner
/ Leslie David Baker
/ Kate Flannery
/ Ed Helms
/ Angela Kinsey
/ Phyllis Smith
Image © NBC Photo: Trae Patton
Story by Erin MacMillan-Ramirez
Starpulse contributing writer