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'Ugly Betty' Recap: Sisters On The Verge Of A Nervous Breakdown

January 23rd, 2009 10:39am EST
Ugly BettyWhen we last saw Betty, her dad had just been taken to the hospital - so it's no surprise that last night's "Ugly Betty" opened on a downer note. Ignacio has just had a quadruple bypass, which means that Hilda, Betty, and Justin are analyzing his every cough.

Betty goes crazy making lists to remind the fam of Ignacio's needs. But after two weeks in Queens, she has to get back to her life in Manhattan. She returns to her apartment where we find that Amanda is genuinely happy to see her roomie again - and a little confused that it was Ignacio, and not Betty, who had the heart attack.

While Betty's been gone, Daniel and Molly have been lounging on St. Barts, and Wilhelmina and Connor have been skiing in the Swiss Alps. The new pairings have wasted no time solidifying their coupledom, but they aren't going public about their new squeezes. Molly, in particular, is concerned about hurting Connor and creating an awkward office situation for Daniel.

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Since he's keeping his relationship on the DL, Daniel secretly slips Betty a CD of his vacation photos so that she can order print-out versions. Around this time, Wilhelmina gives Betty more photos, these from Mode's Halston dress shoot. Betty is supposed to leak the pics to the press to generate buzz. With all these photographs in play, it was easy to guess that there was going to be a mix-up.

Because Wilhelmina and Connor return from their ski trip with matching sunglasses tan lines, Daniel seems to realize that the two were together. But, for whatever reason, he just smirks. (It's surprising because…couldn't Daniel be more open about his relationship with Molly if he knew Connor had moved on?) Willy follows Connor into the bathroom and gives him some illegal cream for evening out skin tone. There, they enjoy a little hanky panky, and Marc later has to zip up Wilhelmina's dress in the hallway so that no one discovers her secret office romance.

As Betty is "leaking" the Halston dress photos (AKA, stuffing the CDs in envelopes), she chats up her family on the phone . Justin announces that Hilda hasn't taken Ignacio to the doctor yet, and Hilda is happily preoccupied with work - she's just been hired to do fifteen teenage girls' hair for a Quincinera.

Betty is busy worrying about her dad's chest cough when Claire happens to pass by her desk. Claire offers to hook up Ignacio with their cardiologist. Apparently, the doctor is a.maz.ing. And since he works in the "Meade wing of the hospital," Betty's fam can get the medical services free. Initially, Hilda is reluctant. She already called their family doctor, and it sounds like Ignacio has a mere chest cold. So, in frustration, Betty vows to handle the situation on her own. Ignacio ends up in a fancy schmancy hospital room (complete with autographed photos of Bill Clinton and Dick Cheney), and the a.maz.ing cardiologist orders a bunch of tests.

Betty is in the waiting room when she gets a phone call from Amanda. Evidently, some photo developer just got their phone bill… Betty gasps - she must have gotten the outgoing mail mixed up! Instead of sending the Halston dress photos to fashion and celebrity commentator Suzuki St. Pierre, she leaked the photos from Daniel and Molly's vacation. Once she learns that her dad's tests will take several more hours, Betty dashes out to try to recover Daniel's photos.

Meanwhile, Wilhelmina is supposed to be meeting with Colette, a representative of a Swiss watch maker who may advertise with Mode. But Willy is MIA, again canoodling with Connor. Marc tries to cover for his boss, but Colette and her cohorts eventually leave, tired of waiting for Wilhelmina to arrive.

When Betty appears shortly thereafter, Marc asks for her advice: What does she do when Daniel is distracted by women? Betty explains that she tries to look at those times as career opportunities - an idea Marc seems to file away for later.

Betty then tells Marc and Amanda about her own problem. How can she get Suzuki to give Daniel's vacation pics back? Their answer: Bribery.

So Amanda and Betty track down Suzuki's ex, who still works at Meade. At first, the guy won't talk about the relationship. But when Amanda gets feisty, Suzuki's ex eventually writes a mysterious Jersey address on Betty's palm. He will say no more.

Taking what she can get, Betty calls Daniel, and the two drive out to the address location. They soon find an ordinary suburban house. Daniel opens the mailbox and finds letters addressed to a "Byron Woo" - a name they don't recognize. Then, a mini-van pulls up, and out hops…Suzuki St. Pierre! He is dressed in a sweatshirt and jeans and is accompanied by a woman and two young boys. While Betty and Daniel gape, Suzuki/Byron compliments the boys' hustle at soccer practice. Then he says, "Get inside, and I'll go grill some brats!"

So it turns out that flamboyant fashionista and celebrity gossip guru Suzuki St. Pierre is a run of the mill family man. Oh, the scandal! With the new information, and with Betty playing the sympathy card, Betty and Daniel convince Suzuki to give back the photos after all. I have to admit - Suzuki caved quicker than I thought he would. But sentimental music was playing, and the camera focused on his loving wife for…so I guess we were supposed to understand that Suzuki St. Pierre really does have a heart. (Insert America Ferrara's standard "Betty" eye-roll here.)

With Picture-gate now resolved, Betty goes back to the hospital. To her horror, she discovers that her dad's tests are over and that he has left. Shamefaced, she calls Hilda, who comes rushing down to Manhattan to help look for Ignacio. While there, the Suarez women learn that their dad's test results show him to be fine; but Hilda is angry that the whole hospital stint is for nothing. Their family doctor was right all along, and Betty was just being a control freak again. As Hilda is pointing out that Betty wasn't even there the night of Ignacio's heart attack, she gets a phone call from Justin. Ignacio is back at home, safe and sound. So the Suarez girls return to Queens.

At home, Ignacio announces that he is hiring a part-time nurse to help with his care. He doesn't want the sisters to fight about him. Betty formally apologizes to Hilda for being gone the night of their dad's health scare, and everyone gets all misty eyed.

At Mode, Marc has managed to get Colette back in the office; but Wilhelmina is again off doing the deed with Connor. When it looks like Colette is about to leave for the second time, a panicked Marc offers to walk Colette through the proposal himself. He is actually doing quite well - and then Wilhelmina shows up. After this scene, the old expression about "throwing someone under the bus" is all that comes to mind. Willy blames her tardiness on Marc, saying that he didn't call her. Marc leaves totally mortified.

Later, Wilhelmina brings Marc a pricey gift as a thank-you, and he starts to say how upset he was by what happened. Wilhelmina only insists that such sacrifices are part of being her assistant. Sad and resigned, Marc eventually backs down. But Wilhelmina is a softie because she later gives Marc a small smile and lets him handle the next meeting with an advertiser. Marc's face lights up like a lightbulb.

In Daniel news, despite his efforts, a photo of him and Molly has made it to page six of The NY Post anyway. The pic is actually of "The Hills'" Spencer and Heidi, but Molly is clearly visible in the background. Thankfully, Daniel's body has been cut out, but you can see that Molly is definitely holding someone's hand. Connor happens to see the pic and looks…angry?...annoyed?...surprised? Okay, it was hard to tell what Connor was thinking. Does he know that it's Daniel's hand in the photo?

On a sad note, Betty ultimately tells Amanda that she's moving out of their apartment. She has to help her family. Sniff, sniff. It's cool that Amanda is so supportive and understanding, but, uh…Shouldn't she be a little concerned about getting stuck by herself with their rent and lease? Maybe that part comes next ep.

Ugly Betty Stars: America Ferrera / Eric Mabius / Alan Dale / Tony Plana / Ana Ortiz / Vanessa Williams / Ashley Jensen / Becki Newton / Mark Indelicato / Michael Urie / Rebecca Romijn / Kevin Sussman / Freddy Rodriguez / Illeana Douglas / Judith Light / Christopher Gorham


Chelsea Fogleman
Story by Chelsea Fogleman

Starpulse contributing writer




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