Dwight arrives at the office to find his chair, his desk and everything that was on his desk covered in gift-wrap. He suspects that it took Jim all night to pull of this joke but Jim corrects him. "It took five minutes. I have a black belt in wrapping." To which Dwight replies, "They don't give out black belts for stupid things." Then he surmises that if he can skin a moosedeer (whatever that is) in under ten minutes then he can unwrap his desk in less time. He throws his briefcase on top of his desk and goes to sit in his chair and it's all made of boxes. The totally fake set up implodes and he falls to the floor in shock. Classic.

Phyllis creates a Christmas office party with a Moroccan theme. She's really milking the fact that she is holding a secret over Angela's head. Michael describes it as," the best Christmas party ever." Phyllis desecrates Angela's Nativity scene, saying it's not in keeping with the theme of the party. She allows Angela to keep a camel, an elephant and a black Magi, everything else she shoves into a drawer. Angela says to camera that she is choosing not to judge Phyllis for her actions but someone will and Phyllis just threw him into a drawer. Then Phyllis orders Angela to remove the Christmas tree from the office and place it into the hallway. Angela tries to argue but Phyllis gives her the "I will tell on you" look and Angela acquiesces. Phyllis tells the camera it's not blackmail, "for it to be blackmail I think there would have to be a formal letter."


Dwight has bought out the most popular toy of the season and is holding them at the office so he can charge lazy parents hundreds of dollars to please their children. The popular toy happens to be a Barbie-like doll with a Unicorn horn in the middle of her forehead. The doll's catch phrase is, "My horn can pierce the sky." Michael walks by Dwight's desk and sees all the dolls. He thought they were all sold out then he sings the catch phrase as it is sung in the doll's commercial. Would someone give this guy a daughter already?


At the office party Michael acts as bartender and creates a "One of Everything" drink which contains equal parts of five different alcohols and two packs of Splenda. Meredith downs one, says, Oh my God!" and asks for another. She gets totally bombed on them and begins belly dancing in the conference room. Andy begins playing the Sitar and sings to Angela about a dance in France where he can see ladies underpants. Angela is appalled, it's Christmas and Andy is singing about ladies underpants and France. Michael also "invents" an orangevodjiuce-ca otherwise known as a Screwdriver. Dwight makes his first sale and Meredith, while dancing drunk, lights her hair on fire.

Meredith catching on fire really puts a damper on the party and proves why open flames are not allowed in office buildings. Michael decides to have an intervention for Meredith. He describes interventions as having a surprise party for people with addictions, "and you get in their face and you scream at them and you make them feel really badly about themselves and then they stop."

Since everyone is going to be staying for the intervention Phyllis orders Angela to make some appetizers of hummus with pita bread, cut into triangles and toasted on both sides then fanned on the plate so to be easily grabbed. Absolute power corrupts absolutely.

Andy tells the camera that he used to get drunk all the time in college they called him Puke, then he says he never let it effect his grades, he aced all of his classes so they called him Ace, then he says he got all B's and they called him Buzz. Either he's lying, he's delusional or he was so drunk he can't remember, no matter what, he's sad.

Michael's idea of an intervention is to ask Meredith if under the influence of alcohol she has ever questioned the teachings of the Mormon Church while following a printout he got off the internet. Michael says her alcoholism has affected him because he was enjoying the best office party ever and then she lit her hair on fire and then they had to do this intervention. Michael asks if anyone has been affected by Meredith's drinking. Kevin answers that one time she bought movie tickets and then got too drunk use them and she gave them to him. He thought that was pretty cool. Michael says anyone who was affected negatively. Kevin implies he should have been more specific.

Michael tries to get Meredith to see she has a problem. She'll only admit to begin addicted to porn. Then Michael asks what she's going to do when she comes into work and she is dead. Dwight says he will stab her in the head with a wooden stick. To camera he reveals that stabbing a zombie in the head with a wooden stick is the best way to kill them.

Michael talks to Meredith privately is his office for 45 minutes then they emerge and Michael asks Toby for the number of the rehab he knows about. Michael drives Meredith around town. She notices that they have passed the bar that she wanted to go to. She rattles off ten other bars they can hit instead. Michael has other plans. He takes Meredith to a rehab center and when she begins to freak out he drags her in kicking and screaming, literally. Turns out you cannot force someone to go to rehab, they have to want to go. Michael vows to help Meredith hit bottom, he did it for Jan he can do it for Meredith.

Meanwhile Dwight is selling out of Unicorn dolls. Toby promises his daughter one for Christmas and goes to buy one from Dwight. This will really help him win over his daughter and show-up his ex-wife. Darryl is buying the last one just as Toby tries to. He begs Darryl to sell the doll to him. Darryl agrees for a price of $400. Toby says he only has $200. Darryl says Toby can owe him the other $200. Toby is relieved and happy until he sees that the doll is African American. He tries to cover his disappointment and shock. Darryl asks if there's something wrong. Toby says, "No it's even better than the one I wanted." Let's hope his daughter feels the same way.

Phyllis tells Angela to bring the Christmas tree back into the office and she gets fed up with being bossed around. She defiantly tells Phyllis to shut up and says it's over because all she has over her head is a secret she's not going to tell anyway. Phyllis is shocked then she shrinks back into her submissive shell and begins to slink away. But something rises up inside of her, apparently getting a taste of self-confidence and dignity gave her a thirst for more. She turns towards the office staff and lets the truth out about Angela sleeping with Dwight and the fact that she caught them doing it in the office. The staff is shocked into stunned silence. Then Andy walks in from another room and plays Angela a song on the Sitar. He is still ignorant of the affair and he takes the rooms silence as a disapproving dig at his playing. He says he just learned how to play the thing and he needs more practice. Then Angela says she wants to go home. Oh snap.

We can only guess how the entire office might choose to blackmail Angela at this point. Or Andy will find out the truth and Angela will be forced to commit to Dwight. Maybe she'll let the marriage stand and go on a Honeymoon. I bet Dwight would take her to the Antique Farm Equipment Museum in Tulare, California located conveniently in the Heritage Complex of the International Agri-Center. So romantic.

The Office stars: Steve Carell / John Krasinski / Jenna Fischer / Rainn Wilson / B.J. Novak / Melora Hardin / Mindy Kaling / Brian Baumgartner / Leslie David Baker / Kate Flannery / Ed Helms / Angela Kinsey / Phyllis Smith


Story by Erin MacMillan-Ramirez

Starpulse contributing writer