Everyone hates going back to school, but these 10 celluloid schools would make any student jump out of bed and get there early. Whether it’s a high school full of fast cars and faster women or an academy for students with “special” talents, this list will get you wishing you were enrolled in one of these fun and fabulous movie schools.
10 - Harrison University - "Old School"
Pros: You get to hang out with your best buds. Age, marriage, kids or reality need not stop you from attending. You never have to actually go to classes or graduate in order to feel like a part of the college scene. You get to meet Snoop Dogg
Cons: The wife of the drunken frat bro' streaking across town will have a hard time repairing the damage done to her social calendar. Since attendance and graduation are optional you have to major in drinking games.
9 - Bronson Alcott High - "Clueless"
Pros: Everyone's rich, your closet would be bigger than most college dorm rooms, you get to play matchmaker and date either Paul Rudd
or Alicia Silverstone
Cons: With a student body that includes the hottie from "Scrubs
" you can't find anyone eligible to date besides the one person who you're related to, even if only by law.
8 - Verona High - "10 Things I Hate About You"
Pros: Your high school looks like a castle and spends as much as a small university on extracurricular activities like archery. Some random hottie might take over the PA system, convince the band to help him and serenade you just to get you to go to prom.
Cons: Produces super villains, Heath Ledger
(Joker), Joseph Gordon-Levitt
(Cobra Commander), Julia Stiles
7 - Ridgemont High - "Fast Times at Ridgemont High"
Pros: Hot chic in red bikini. Shopping, eating, dating and hanging out at the mall seem to be the only requirements for graduating. Pizza delivery to your classroom. One word: Spicoli.
Cons: You might get knocked up and dumped or end up working at a fast food joint in the mall.
6 - Rydell High - "Grease"
Pros: You get to wear cool 50's clothes and join a gang. You get to burst into song and dance. You get to hang with your best friends forever and fly off in a convertible after graduating.
Added Pro: "Cool Rider"
Cons: You better know how to sing, dance and drive fast cars. Your gang is by far the wimpiest in gang history other than "The Jets" in "West Side Story
." Frenchie might do your hair.
Added Con: "Rockahula Luau"
5 - Rushmore Academy - "Rushmore"
Pros: You'll have a huge drama department budget and more clubs than you could possibly have time to join. Getting a crush on your teacher can lead to more clubs, bigger plays and a friendship/rivalry with an eccentric older businessman with very deep pockets.
Cons: Getting a crush on your teacher can also get you a major butt whoopin', your teacher fired and a ton of make-up homework. Worst-case scenario, you are suspended and sent to (gasp) public school where the drama department budget is less than zero. You're forced to pull off an outstanding play on your shoestring budget in the style of "Dogma 95."
4 - Grand Lakes University - "Back To School"
Pros: Dorm parties are headlined by Oingo Boingo
. Your neighbors would be Ironman and that creepy/cute guy from "Christine
." Your Professor will give you an A- for reciting a poem. Some guy's dad keeps buying everyone books, beer and food. And they let anyone join the diving team.
Cons: You have to put up with the leader of the Cobra Kai from "Karate Kid
3 - Adams College - "Revenge of the Nerds"
Pros: School motto would be "All nerds think about is sex." For every nerd who ever felt alone this place is for you. Nerds have unionized. For the girls who love nerds this is where you get your Mrs. Degree in nerdology or major in quantum physics.
Cons: You'll have to face humiliation and fight some jocks in order to usher in a new era of cool for nerds everywhere. The world will thank you, Bill Gates and Steve Jobs.
2 - Shermer High - "Breakfast Club," "Sixteen Candles," "Ferris Bueller's Day Off," "Weird Science"
Pros: One girl will give you her panties to help you become cool and to shut you up. Another girl will give you a Captain Crunch/Pixie Stix sandwich and her heart. The guy everyone loves might whisk you off on an adventure involving a parade, a Porsche and a principal with a chip on his shoulder. Your Barbie doll might come to life and act like a Genie.
Cons: You have to listen to everyone's really sad backstories before you can date them. Your brother might be turned into a big pile of pooh, or is that a pro?
1 - Hogwarts Academy - "Harry Potter" (any one in the series)
Pros: Magic makes anything possible and Hogwarts make magic possible ergo Hogwarts make anything possible. It's the perfect school. Lunch program rocks! Classes are always being canceled due to trolls, werewolves, Dementors, student deaths, evil wizards trying to kill some kid named Harry.
Cons: You might be the student who dies, chances of death increase in relation to time spent around a certain student named Harry Potter. There seems to be an unusual amount of time and attention spent on this Harry kid, which can make you feel very small and unimportant. Or is that because you sat next to Hagrid?
Story by Erin MacMillan-Ramirez
Starpulse contributing writer