With stories like Britney Spears
being offered a $1,000 by PETA
to work as their secretary for a day, it's getting harder and harder to tell what's true and what's false. In this case, the story is true. But there are a few other stories out there that may be harder to discern.
Don't worry, Starpulse breaks it down for you. The following are hoax stories coming out of the Starpulse April Fool's Day newsroom:
After swearing to a life of bachelorhood, George Clooney
marries himself.Hillary Clinton
as her running mate. Bill refuses and runs away giggling because he misunderstands the terminology.Miley Cyrus
reveals that she's actually Billy Ray Cyrus
trying to revitalize his career by dressing in drag. He apologizes on Oprah
for letting it escalate so quickly.
The Blue Collar Comedy tour and the Original Kings of Comedy switch places without telling their audiences. Bill Pullman
plays Bill Paxton
in a new movie about Bill Pullman.Simon Cowell
sings on American Idol
gets a full-blown IRS audit, complete with back taxes so large that he's got to spend time in jail. Then, after a year in the joint, everyone he's ever messed with comes out in sideways trucker hats, tongues lagging, and shouts, "You've just been punked."Al Gore
announces his new plan to fight global warming by having everyone turn their air conditioners on high and open up all their windows.Willem Dafoe
is Liv Tyler's
real father.George Lucas
is announced as the author of the new Star Trek
; Jar Jar Binks is rumored to play Dr. Spock.Jim Carrey
is given an Oscar.
Fox announces a whole new line up of quality programming that makes you think.Cuba Gooding Jr.
gets a job.
The makers of the hit Terminator
trilogy decide to find a way to continue a story that has gotten so out of control it is quickly becoming the next "Star Trek" franchise. Christian Bale
will play John Connor in "Terminator 4." Soon there will be sci-fi conventions where sad people who would otherwise be unable to get any dates host "Rise of the Machines" themed weddings. There will be no stopping the uprising, unless, we can find some way to go back in time! Quick, send the Governor of California! Wait…Kathie Lee Gifford
is left out in the sun for too long and melts.
The Patriots will go an undefeated 19-0 and the New York Giants will throw the game away at the very end.Paul Giamatti
decides to follow up his seven-part HBO series on John Adams with a 15-part series on former president James K. Polk.
The cast of Friends
gets together for one final reunion episode of Seinfeld
. Nobody can tell the difference. Keira Knightley
and Natalie Portman
are spotted in the same room as one another, proving that they aren't the same person. Then they turn sideways and disappear. Tyra Banks
announces herself the winner of America's Next Top Model
. Johnny Depp
takes his first shower since meeting Tim Burton
gets mad at Depp for selling out.Amy Adams
makes millions of dreams come true by marrying every man on the planet. John Krasinski
marries all the women, but then goes crazy when they wont stop calling him "Jim from the office
" and asking about Pam.
Story by James Fagan
Starpulse.com contributing writer