Review: 'Green Lantern' 'Two Jews On Film' Agree This Superhero Falls To The Ground (Video)
By Joan Alperin-Schwartz: Okay, so this is how the story goes...In a universe far, far away (where else would it be) an elite, powerful force has existed for centuries. Protectors of peace and justice, they are called the Green Lantern Corps.
Helpful fact to know for those of you unfamiliar with the DC comic...Green is the color of will. Yellow is the color of fear. So...green is good...yellow, bad...very very bad.
Moving along...Each Green Lantern wears a ring that grants him the ability to create anything that their mind can imagine...Pretty cool, right?
Unfortunately, this really big, really evil, super-gross looking creature named Parallax escapes from his intergalatic prison and threatens to destroy the balance of power in the Universe. Parallax oozes yellow...In other words, he makes you afraid...very afraid and sucks up your energy. Things are starting to looking really grim.
Luckily Hal Jordan (Ryan Reynolds) comes to the rescue. As fate would have it, Jordan, a cocky, gifted test pilot is chosen by the Ring to be the new member of the Green Lantern Corps.
Now, the Green guys have little respect for humans. Afterall, no human has ever been chosen to wear the ring of power. Well, it looks like all that is about to change now that Hal has the ring...There's only one small problem...Cocky Pilot guy has to master his fears, stop being wishy washy, and man up. Luckily for him, he has his childhood sweetheart, Carol Ferris (Blake Lively) to cheer him on.
Hal gets transported to the Lanterns; home world...OA...where he meets varioust members of the Green Lantern Corps...Including the warrior Sinestro (Mark Strong), the towering drill instructor Kilowog (voiced by Michael Clarke Duncan) and the ridiculously tall, aneroxic-looking, Guardians.
But after barely one day of Super Hero Training 101, Hal realizes he doesn't have what it takes to wear the ring and flees back to Earth. But you know what they say...Once the ring chooses you...You're IT.
So Hal must find a way to overcome his fear, deal with one or two unresolved childhood issues and he must do all this quickly...Because...Parallex is coming to Earth and it isn't for a vacation.
As if he doesn't have enough to worry about, Hal's childhood friend, the brilliant scientist, Razzle Worthy (Peter Sarsgaard) has been infected with Parallex's DNA and he's starting to resemble a deformed troll with a gynormous, monstrous head.
Yes, 'Green Lantern' is shot in 3D - at least some of it...And yes...there are some cool CGI effects, but on the whole...this film is one big disappointment.
The scenes between Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively are boring and repetitious...The Green Lanterns home world looks cartoonish and the characters lacked depth. The story is just way too simplistic in my humble opinion.
Not a lot of bagels for this one. And this is one of the rare times, the 'Two Jews On Film' actually agree.
'Green Lantern' directed by Martin Campbell, opens in theaters Friday June 17, 2011. Love to know what you think.
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