'Survivor: Nicaragua' Recap: Sashtastic
This is going to be a short post. I had a very long, well thought out post and then my computer went haywire and poof- it's gone. I've spent the last 5 minutes with my arms wrapped around my screen, muttering, "Oh no, oh no, oh no," over and over and over again. I just lost a lot of good words, people, and they are fluttering around free in cyberspace for some other Survivor fanatic to swipe right out of the air and use in their own recap. If that happens, Survivor fans, promise me you won't read it.
This week's Survivor begins with the tribemates naming their pet chicken Kelly Nay. I howled like a hyena and gave them imaginary props for their snide commemmorance of the two little chickens that left during last week's Tribal Council. Unfortunately, Kelly and Nay were swept off to enjoy hot showers and luxury dinners at the Ponderosa house, a fate that neither of them particularly earned, while poor Kelly Nay actually ends up as a luxury dinner later in the show. Life just ain't fair.
We see Sash yammering on and on about losing his alliance- and I will admit- he took a pretty hard hit by losing Brenda, Nay and Purple Kelly over the past couple of shows, but he's certainly in no immediate danger. He has an Immunity Idol, for crying out loud. Beeyotch ain't going nowhere. Aside from that, he's a sneaky, manipulative, crafty, slithery, skinny, little ne'er do well who can shut you down without raising his voice. There's a word for that, people and that word is SCARY. Somebody better take care of him and fast. Keep your friends close and your enemies closer? That was written just for Mr. Sashtastic himself.
The reward challenge is pretty boring, and definitely a repeat of old challenges so I'll skip to the end and tell you that Chase wins. He has the chance to take two tribemates with him. He understandably chooses Holly, as anyone would be a jackass not to after her sacrifice for the tribe last week. But then...he picks Jane. Huh? Why in the heck would you do that, pretty boy? You take a sure thing and leave 4 dudes behind to plot and plan your demise? Not too smart, kiddo. You might want to consult with Holly before you make any more large moves yourself.
Back at camp, the boys are doing exactly as predicted...saying all the right things...us 4 to the end, yada, yada, yada...take out Holly and Jane, blah, blah, blah....Chase is a girl, waa, waa, waa. Has Sash really gone over to their side? It doesn't appear to be so after Jane, Holly and Chase return from reward. Sash makes Chase promise on his mother about taking him to the end, but the most interesting conversation to me was between Sash and Jane. Actually, it was pretty creepy. It's almost like Sash was flirting with her, but he kept calling her his second momma. He told her he would never vote her out, amongst other odd comments, and Jane, being the Southern woman that she is, diffused the frightening conversation with, "Ok, ok, ok, Sash." We Southern women have a way of doing that. I imagine that Jane left the convo rolling her eyes, while Sash stood around smiling and feeling like the cherry on top of an ice cream Sundae.
At the immunity challenge, Sash successfully deciphers a very difficult looking puzzle involving stacks of gold coins, leaving Fabio and Benry in the dust. At camp, Fabio impresses me with his subtle campaigning to Sash. I honestly was quite impressed and am left wondering if Fabio is truly a flaky, somewhat air-headed surfer dude or if he has been playing us all with a fake dumb blonde kid persona. His request to Sash that he let him know if his name comes up to be voted off was a pretty good way to portray himself as vulnerable and forge a bond with a key swing vote. I liked it. Well played, Fabio, well played.
It seems that despite his efforts, Fabio may be heading out after all, as his name is pretty much the only one being tossed about camp. He is saved, however, when the new foursome of Chase, Sash, Jane and Holly decide to boot Benry. I don't know about you, but I really don't like it that Survivor is leaving out huge chunks of valuable information going into Tribal Council. Show us a bit more of the back-stabbing and scheming like you used to do before the vote, Survivor. That's what brings the suspense. I really didn't care who went home last night but had you teased it up a bit more for me, the blindside of Benry might feel a little more exciting. Ya listening, Mark what's your name???
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