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'Survivor: Philippines' 2012 – What This Tribe Needs Is Cookies!

Roxanne Tellier Roxanne Tellier
September 27th, 2012 11:50am EDT

It’s finally time for the challenge. This time, two contestants must pull a heavy sled through sand and retrieve puzzle pieces three separate times. The pieces will then be brought back to the start, and put together. One person will be the ‘caller,’ telling the players where to put the puzzle pieces. Kalabaw and Tandang each sit out a player, so that all three teams have only five players. Which means that at least one player from each tribe will have to drag the sled back and forth more than once.

Despite Russell’s best pep talks, his people lack team spirit. Angie doesn’t want to run twice, and Roxy says she’s been drinking less water, so may become dehydrated if she does. In fact, Angie barely makes it through her first attempt, and struggles with the second.  But she does give it her all.  Which is still too little, too late. And once again, Matsang are in third place, neatly avoiding any rewards, and headed for yet another Tribal Council.

Russell is furious.  He tells Jeff, “I’m sick of this. I can’t do this. I can’t handle this. Either go hard or go home. These folks haven’t decided yet that they are unbeatable and they can do this. They got to get their heads out of their butts or go home.”  

Back at camp, Russell can’t decide who his worst player is; Roxy, who whines about everything and doesn’t properly prepare for challenges, or Angie, the bubble headed blond who’s canoodling with Malcolm.

Roxy continues to complain that Angie and Malcolm’s hookup is disgusting, and also the reason why companies don’t like fraternization. She can respect people who play a good game, but, “that one don’t have no skills at all – she just shows the boobs.” She tells anyone who’ll listen that Angie must go, not just because she’s the weakest link, but because of her relationship with Malcolm. Meanwhile, clueless Angie is completely surprised to find out that Roxy’s targeting her. What sleeping situation? What?

Could things get any worse? Sure! Let’s go to Tribal Council. Jeff immediately wants to talk about Russell’s outburst at the challenge, and Russell confirms that he’s come to the game to kick butt. Denise agrees that they’ve been working hard at camp, but still lost. Jeff asks Roxy to finish this sentence for him: “If there’s anything I could change about this tribe it would be  …”

“… that they won’t invest 75% of their energy into being workhorses around camp. “ Jeff clarifies that she means that they put too much work into the everyday needs of the camp, and she agrees. The tribe members disagree, but are completely blown away when Angie’s answer to the same question is …

“That we could have cookies.”  Face palm time! Even Jeff seems to lose his famous cool at her answer. Malcolm tries to soft pedal the reply, but Jeff is relentless. “Really? Really? In a game for a million dollars, one of your tribe mates says cookies would be good, and you say, yeah, they actually would be?”

Russell tries to bring it back to everyone giving it all they’ve got. Self-righteous Roxy gets on her high horse and outs Angie and Malcolm’s sleeping arrangement. I’m waiting to hear her scream “Burn the Witch!”  Malcolm denies a relationship, but admits they’ve been snuggling. He says it’s not romantic; Angie’s like a little sister to him. “Wow, creepy!” notes Roxy. Roxy admits she’s been bothered since Day One by Angie’s ‘booby trap.’

Jeff asks Angie if she understands that the mere mention of being with somebody else is enough to get you voted out of this game. And Roxy’s just thrown that cloud of suspicion over the both of them. Angie says she does understand, but that’s Roxy’s opinion.

Jeff is so blown away by Angie’s cluelessness that he claps his hands, and tells her to wake up. Angie just keeps smiling as Roxy warns the others that they’ll need good luck if they keep Angie over her.

Well, Roxy, it appears that they were feeling lucky, as all votes but Roxy’s own for Angie are cast for Roxy. Whether she was right or wrong, the tribe simply couldn’t keep a self-righteous, non-working, troublemaker in the game.  

Roxy’s exit interview: “It’s been six days, but it’s been six long days. I think that the relationship between Angie and Malcolm will impact the game of Denise and Russell. At this point, there’s no place to hide, and every single one of them better be superstar Olympians. I have some good ties to that group, but if they believe they’ve made the best decision, may God be with them. “

Next time on Survivor: Lisa scrambles to fit in, determined to play the hand that she’s dealt. Russell slides, drawing on his faith in God. And Skupin puts everything on the line at a challenge. “Skupin’s bleeding from the face!”

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