Last week on "House" Cameron walked off the show, but somehow this week Jennifer Morrison is still on the opening credits as a main cast member. And the two actors who are actually on the show now, Taub and Thirteen, are still missing from them. Are they ever going to redo those credits? What the heck! It's been years. Oh yeah, so Cameron left the show and Chase is now part of the team. House tried for like ten minutes to be a sane person about Cuddy and Lucas, but as we can see that attempt is officially over.

The new patient is a brilliant physicist who gave up his work to get married and deliver packages for a living. I feel like we've heard this one before. House agrees to treat him and is generally being pleasant to Cuddy now, and this disturbs her. He's playing nice so he can be invited to Thanksgiving dinner with her, and he plans to break up her and Lucas. Welcome back evil House. We saw you last week when you tried to split apart Cameron and Chase, and that worked so well you've decided to continue the trend. House diagnoses the patient as having TTP and brushes it off, but when they do remove his spleen to treat the condition the patient just gets worse. I know, shocker.

As the case goes on everyone tries to make Chase feel better. Foreman asks how he is doing, Taub invites him to Thanksgiving dinner, and Thirteen whines about something or other. She'll probably be hooking up with Chase next since her worth on this show is about which person she sleeps with and/or how soon she'll die from an inherited disease. Chase shuts them all down, assuring everyone he's fine, but you can just sense the underlining fury radiating from his every pore. It looks good on him. Meanwhile Wilson tells House to stop stalking Cuddy, and it never works. He manages to get invited to Cuddy's for Thanksgiving, but it turns out she tricked him. No one is there. Aw. That was actually very sad. Go back to Wilson, House, he'll feed you!

So of course he gets drunk and shows up at Lucas' place miserable and whines he's in love with Cuddy. That was a good indicator to the audience he was just faking it. Like House would ever say those words to anyone, even drunk. Lucas then breaks up with Cuddy over it. Aw. House is very glad about this, because he's still a mean, spoiled man. And people were concerned they'd change House too much! Naw. Oh yes, back to the dying man. They find out that he's been taking a great deal of couch medication to dumb himself down. He's constantly high one way or the other, not unlike House, to make the world more bearable. He's so smart he is miserable and he's married a dumb woman, so he dumbs himself down to be happy. Wow. Sounds like a happy marriage?

Taub's marriage is on the rocks because he's working for House again. No one cares. House then figures out that Cuddy and Lucas never broke up because he tricks her by offering tickets to something, and then ... no idea. She's scammed him and he scams her and she scams him back and no one is broken up this episode. And House just shrugs it off and accepts it. For now. When talking to the patient he realizes that he was right from the beginning: it's TTP. It's just that the patient tried to commit suicide because he's too smart or something, and it caused his spleen to break into pieces. Can our spleens do that? Creepy. They have to take out the other parts of the spleen and he'll be fine. Then he can go back to his stupid wife and stupid life and there's no way at all she'll leave him for thinking she's dumb as a post.

Oh Chase punches House in the face, and it is awesome. So, so awesome. He's really deserved it the past few episodes, and this punch has been a long time coming because House punched him a few seasons ago. Chase did it so everyone would back off him about Cameron, and House seems okay with it. Then Taub lies to his wife that he punched House, and she loves him again. ...okay? Not a bad episode of "House," although the super smart guy dumbing down his life for love felt very familiar for some reason. Plus it was nice to see House being a little mature about Cuddy and Lucas. So much for that.

"House" is on FOX Monday nights at 8 PM EST.

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Story by Chelsea Doyle
Starpulse contributing writer

Follow Chelsea on twitter at http://twitter.com/mustbethursday.