It seems you can’t turn on the TV this week, or month, without seeing the Muppets. Thanks to their brand new Hollywood movie, The Muppets are back. The Muppets is a star studded affair written by Jason Segel, costarring Segal, Amy Adams and Chris Cooper, with cameos from everyone who’s anyone.

Of course, the real stars are the Muppets and they have smartly made the Muppets the center of attention. So Kermit the Frog himself and Miss Piggy herself actually did the press junket to talk about the film. Here then is the only Muppets interview that matters, Kermit and Piggy.

Q: It must be nice to be back at work. What is SAG scale for frogs and pigs?

KTF: I think all we get is that little disclaimer at the end of the film that says we weren’t harmed. I think that’s all we actually get.

Q: Where have you been hiding all these years?

KTF: Yeah, well, frogs are good at hiding. We hang out in the swamp. I spend a lot of time under rocks. We’ve actually been pretty busy over the years. We just haven’t had a big film in a while. We did lots of stuff for the smaller screens, for the internet, for television but this is the first time, it’s true, we have been hiding from the big screen. I am very happy to be back on the big screen.

MP: Yes, moi is too but not nearly as happy as all of moi’s fans of course.

Q: Why is Fozzy such a diva he won’t be here today?

KTF: Fozzy really wanted to be here.

MP: Who’s this?

KTF: Fozzy.

MP: Fozzy, I have heard of him. I’ve heard of him.

KTF: Piggy, come on, you’ve been working with Fozzy for 30 years.

MP: He’s almost never around when I’m here.

KTF: Yeah, strange. It’s odd somehow.

MP: Why is that? Does he not like me?

KTF: I don’t know, it might be a personality conflict.

MP: Maybe he thinks I don’t like him.

KTF: No, I think it is a personality conflict.