If you were to write a book or a movie script, what would it be about?

[STRICKEN11]

its based off of 1 of my gfs storeis ive read so i guess so

[grimoneus]

its based off of 1 of my gfs storeis ive read so i guess so

VERY cool,lil bro...

[STRICKEN11]

VERY cool,lil bro...

i think so. she is really talented

[grimoneus]

i think so. she is really talented

Of that I have no doubt,Dan.

[nicerack]

The ultimate betrayal.

[grimoneus]

The schism between scientific facts and religious dogma...And they can be reconciled.

[66fiveandahalf]

It would be about alien vampire hookers

[grimoneus]

It would be about alien vampire hookers

Sounds like a script film auteurs Robert Rodriguez,Darren Aronofsky or Quentin Tarantino would be interested in adapting for the silver screen...Cool.

[~SexyVampireMel~]

i now have 54 pages done so far and still workin on it....im about to kill of one of the charactors....goan be really gross too.

[grimoneus]

i now have 54 pages done so far and still workin on it....im about to kill of one of the charactors....goan be really gross too.

Sounds like your manuscript is better than that Meyers' tripe Twilight,lil sis...Keep up the good work!

[~SexyVampireMel~]

Sounds like your manuscript is better than that Meyers' tripe Twilight,lil sis...Keep up the good work!

AWWW...THANX!

[STRICKEN11]

in my book this kid his name is john has just seen his family killed on the street...based on real life

[p.hanson]

Okay, I've already posted this on another forum, but it's out of order there. But to whoever hasn't read it, here's a story I wrote.

And for those who have already been reading it, the new stuff is in blue.

This is mostly about two maternal half sisters named Carrie (Age 21) and Maya (Age 15).
   
Carrie, who doesn't know who or where her father is, is kind of throwing her life away (drinking, drugs, ect.) just like her mother (Michelle). She is also a stripper who's had many boyfriends.

   Maya gets badly beat on by her mother (Michelle). Michelle has had a grudge against Maya for a long time. When Maya was four years old, she had a 6 year old brother named Kevin.
   
One Day: Maya and Kevin were playing in the streets, and Kevin playfuly pushed her. She turned around and pushed him back into the street, not seeing the oncoming car...

Little Maya walked up to her mom, who was hovering over Kevin's lifeless body. "Momma, is he okay?" Michelle felt a sudden intense rage. "You rotten... little..SH*T!" Screamed Michelle as she hit Maya backhand across the face, knocking her unconscious.
    
11 Years Later: To this day, Michelle has blamed her for it. And Maya believes her too. It was pretty often for Michelle to hold her at knife point, threatening to kill her if she made a move, and cutting her arms and the back of her neck to prove her point. Maya, although small for her age, was very pretty. She had long and soft brunnete hair, baby blue eyes, perfect heart-shaped face, and always a sweet smile.  But she has to cover all her bruises and scars with make-up and long sleeved shirts.  So, nobody knows how bad she's really treated. And she's terrified of anyone touching her neck.  She suffered so much physical and emotional trauma, that she's very scared all the time and has terrible panic attacks. She lives in fear, but she desperatly craves love and protection.
   

The Break Up: One day, Maya was at Jason's house, laying across his lap on the couch watching TV. She loved that he was massaging her hip with one hand, and holding her hand with the other. It relaxed her so much that she was almost asleep. She felt so safe with him. Sometimes, when Michelle was high on meth, Maya would sneek in through Jason's window, and she'd stay with him until things cooled down. But she was caught making out with him a few times by his Mom. She knew Laurie never liked or trusted her. Just as Maya was dozing off, Laurie spoke up loudly, saying "Okay, you gotta leave. Now!" Still holding Jason's hand, she sits ap and says "What? Why? What'd I do?" Laurie says "I don't need a reason, just get outof here!" Jason spoke up. No Mom! She didn't do anything!" Laurie snapped back. "Jason, don't question me!. Get on up to your room NOW! And YOU girl!" Pointing at Maya "Get out of my house! I don't want you coming around her no more! You hear?!" Laurie lead her outside and started yelling again. "Don't you listen?! Get outta here you little cutting stoner!"
Maya couldn't believe it. She wasn't a stoner, and she never cut herself. Her clothes would sometimes smell like pot from her mom and sister smoking it. No matter how much she showered and wore perfume, she couldn't get rid of it completely. And the cuts all across her arms and all over her body was from her mom torturing her with knives. And her dark cloths and make up didn't help matters any either.

She fought back. "You think I'm a stoner?! You don't know #@$%#$ about me!" Then Laurie said "Oh, is that what you think? I know all about you and that prostitute you call your sister! You're just like her! And now you're trying to seduce my boy!" Maya then yells back "Back off! I get it from my mom, I get it from everybody else! And I sure as hell don't need it from YOU!" Laurie points a finger at her. "Listen here you sorry little Tart! You better get outta here befor I call the police. And by the way, you smell like pot. I doubt the police would like that very much!" Maya screamed out of anger and walks home. She would never tell her she was crying.

a few weeks later during dinner time:  Maya came in a little hungrier than usual. She burned up alot of energy taking care of the horses. She took a shower, then sat at the table. She grabbed a little more food than usual. As they were eating, Michelle kept looking at Maya and her plate. "A little much, don't you think?" She said. ignoring her, Maya kept on eating. "What, are you trying to fatten up for the winter or something?" Asked Michelle. Maya's face turned a little red. Michelle continued. "You know, we raise horses here, not big fat heffers" Maya looked down at herself. Her body wasn't even the slightest bit chubby. A tear was rolling down her cheek.  "Maw, shut up" Said Carrie as she held Maya's hand under the table. "No, don't tell me to shut up!" Yelled Michelle. Maya gently squeezed Carrie's hand back, biting her lip trying not to cry. But she started to anyway. Looking at her tears, Michelle still continued. "God, it's no wonder Jason Dumped you. He deserves better than a lard-A$$ loser like you. That's right, cry. It'll do you some good" Jason didn't dump her. In fact, they were the best of friends. He really loved her. But his mom Laurie thought she was a bad influence on him, considering the cuts all acrossed her arms, the way she dresses, her dark hair, and the dark make-up. She thought Maya was a brainless, self harming trouble maker. But Maya kind of agreed with the brainless thing. Ever since she was four, the head injury left her with massive head-aches. Every time she tried to read alot, espesially the small print and even think really hard, she got a huge migrain big enough to pass-out. So she didn't think she was very smart at all. But she knew she wasn't self harming. Laurie also knew how her sister Carrie was too, so she thought Maya was a tramp as well. Maya felt a sudden rage. She tightened her grip on her glass of soda she had her hand on, and crushed it. Not even paying attention to the shards of glass slicing into her palm and the fizz from the soda stinging the open cuts, She let out a scream of anger as she threw her silverwear back on the plate, making a huge clattering sound. She got up from her seat and left to go to her and her sister's room.

Two days later: It was about 1:00 in the morning. Dad was away working a nightshift, and mom was deeply passed out from having too much to drink. Carrie was almost asleep. About 15 minutes earlier, the sound of her sister Maya getting up for something, then going back to bed woke her up. As she was just about to doze off, she heard something bumping against the wall, and groaning. She thought about ignoring it, but decided not too. She turned on the light to see what was up. She saw Maya in bed, clutching her stomach in pain. And her legs were shaking, occationally bumping the wall.  And her face was going pale. Carrie thought to herself "Crap, what's wrong with her?" She looked down at the floor by Maya's bed. She was shocked at what she found. An empty pill bottle. She had swallowed all of mom's sleeping pills. "Oh sh*t!" She yelled. In a panic, she shook her sister awake. Maya looked at her, then dozed off again. Again, Carrie shook her, yelling "Get up goddamnit!" before Maya could pass out again. Carrie literally pulled her out of bed and on her feet. Carrie put maya's arm around her shoulder so she wouldn't fall over, and started leading her to the bathroom. Maya dragged her feet, she didn't wanna go. But she didn't have the stegnth to stop her. But she still tried really hard. "NO!" Maya yelled, still trying to break free. Carrie finally got her to the bathroom. Carrie yanked Maya's arm until she toppled to the floor on her knees. Aside from her hallucinations, Maya found herself with her head over the toilet. Carrie reached over to the sink and grabbed a toothbrush. Still in a daze, Maya saw her sister with it in her hand. She knew what Carrie was gonna do with it. Maya clamped her mouth shut and tried to free herself from Carries grip, but she was too weak from the effects of the pills, and she was shaking even worse now. She couldn't controle her hands, because they were twitching and shaking so bad. Carrie held her still and pried her mouth open. She shoved the handle of the toothbrush down Maya's throat. Seeing that Maya was fighting it and trying not to gag, Carrie rammed her fist into her sister's belly, hard. "Come on! Work with me, goddamnit!" Carrie yelled. After a few attempts, she finally got her to throw up the remaining, undisolved pills. Carrie was so relieved, nowing her sis was gonna make it. She pulled her up on her feet again and backed her into the wall. She grabbed her by the arms and shook her screaming "What the hell were you thinking , you DUMBASS?! Maya looked away. Carrie pushed her into the wall again. "No, YOU listen to ME! How on Earth could you be so stupid?! Did you honestly think that you'd just slip away painlessly in your sleep and all you problems would be solved?! Right! You'd go strait to hell!" Maya fought back. "I already am! This is LIVING HELL!!" She roared. Carie then yelled "And you think downing those pills would've fixed it?! You don't know the HALF of it!! You would've been having seizures like crazy! Then you'd be screaming in agony untill you choke to death on your own vomit!! Is that what you want?! HUH?! Damn, that's about the stupidest thing I've ever seen you do. Now get to bed...NOW!!!" She roared. After Carrie left, Maya started sobbing, thinking, "Will this ever end?" She rinsed out her mouth and dried her tears. Then went back to the room and climbed in bed. Still crying, she faced the wall. She them felt Carrie's hand on her shoulder. "Okay look, I didn't do that to be mean. I just didn't wanna see you go like that. You're not stupid, okay?" Said Carrie. Then Maya quietly said "I was so close. Why'd you have to stop me?" She was still tired, weak, and drugged up from the pills. Carrie started softly combing her fingers through Maya's hair. She reasured her "It'll be better tomorrow, okay? Just sleep it off, it's gonna be alright. Just take it easy, it's okay. I'm here for you..." Carrie's calming words, soothing voice, and gentle hand relaxed her. Carrie stayed by her side untill she fell asleep...
 


A week and a half later: She hasn't been willing to eat a thing since that night, she was pretty much trying to starve herself to death. And the hunger pains, depression, and fear was becoming too much. It was about 11:00 at night, Maya was on the phone talking to Jason. She was crying, holding something in her pajama pocket.

Maya:"I don't know if I can do this anymore Jason, I just can't take it."

Jason:"Maya please, don't let it get to you. You know people love you."

Maya:"I just want it all to end."

Jason:"Trust me, things will get better. Just hang in there."

Maya:"I miss you so much"

Jason:"We miss you too. I gotta go, okay?"

Maya:"Okay, bye"

Jason:"Bye"

Maya just sat there for a few minutes before getting up.  She walked into the den and looked at the glass angels in the china case.  She closed her eyes, took a deep breath and smiled a bit. Then she went to the other side of the room.  She whispered "Sorry bro.  I can't do it.  I'll see you soon though, okay?"  She reached into her pocket and put dad's loaded pistol back in the safe. She went back in her and Carrie's room and crawled into her sister's bed.  She snuggled up next to her, and was crying again.  Carrie put her arm around her. Carrie's been nicer to Maya ever since she was the only one to comfort Carrie after she got raped.  "Maya, what's the matter?"...

One night a week later:   Maya and her mom were fighting again. Michelle was just about to raise her fist when dad stepped in. He broke them up and grabbed Michelle by the shirt. He says "If you strike that girl one more time, I swear to God I'll call the cops!" He let go, and Michelle backed off. Then he turned to Maya and yells "Why do you always heve to piss her off?! Can't you just behave?!" Maya was shocked. But she knew that he would never hurt her. "What did I do?" She said as she put her head on his chest, hoping he would hold her. He pushed her off of him, and put her head between his hands, looking right at her. Maya said sobbing "I didn't do anything." not making eye contact, "Yes you did. You ruined her life, and now you're skrewin' it up for the rest of us" He put his hands on her shoulders and said "Just try to be good" maya looks up at him and says again "I didn't do anything" Then her dad said "You know what? Don't even talk to me" then he left for his night shift. When his car was gone, Michelle walked towards her. Maya tried to make a break for it, but Michelle yanked her back. "You heard him. Do everything I say!" Suddenly, she took her cup of coffee and splashed it in Maya's face"  She instantly screamed from the burning pain. She started to wipe it off on her shirt, but Michelle grabbed her and yells "Here, cool off outside!" pulling her. Maya refuses, seeing that's it's pouring rain out. She swung her arm back, hitting Michelle right in the kidney. She bellered and let go a minute. She grabbed her again, but by the throat this time. She said "You little brute! I'll kill you #@$%#$!" Smashing Maya's head against the wall, knocking her out cold.  She fell to the floor unconscious. Michelle sighed and put her hands under her daughters arms and started dragging her to the door.
   It was still pouring rain out. Jason's mom Laurie was grabbing something out of the car. She looked over at the Saunder's house. She's saw something on the porch. It was hard to see in the rain and darkness, but she finally realized it was a person. She walked a little closer and realized it was her son's ex Maya. She seem's to have fallen asleep. It was cold, and her hands were between her knees to stay warm, and she was shivering. She didn't look as threatening as she always thought. To see if she was okay, Laurie called her name. Maya woke up, looked up at a face that suddenly apeared in the lightning flash.  She gasped and practically screamed as she almost attacked, because she didn't expect such a sudden scary sight at all. "Whoa whoa! It's okay, it's just me" said Laurie. Maya calmed down a tiny bit and answered...

Maya: "What do you want?! I left your precious son alone!"

Laurie: "What in the world are you doing out here in this time and weather?"

Maya: "Why the heck do YOU care? Because I know you don't. Just leave me the hell alone!"

Laurie looked at Maya, there was rain running down her face and soaking her hair. The rain washed off her make-up, so Laurie could see what Maya's been hiding. She moved her hair out of the way and realized there were huge bruises on her neck, cheek, and shoulders. And she looked thinner than when she last saw her. She was shocked. But she continued.

Laurie: "Look, it wasn't anything against you personally. I just don't want him exposed to that"

Maya: "Exposed to what?! I didn't do anything to him! Just get away from me, please"

Laurie: "Not until you tell me why your out here."

Maya was starting to get a headache and was so tired. She finally answered "It was momma"

Laurie: "What do you mean?" She then sat next to Maya.

Maya: She was almost crying as she mumbled....."She locked me out"

Laurie: "Is this the first time?"

Maya: "No"

Maya didn't tell her everything about her mom. But she did tell her why she was "So stupid"

 

Laurie: "Do you really want me to leave you alone?"

After a pause, Maya shook her head no. She started grumbling and put her head on Laurie's shoulder. She was still really tired and could barely stay awake. She fell asleep. Laurie woke her up again an let her inside their house to dry off and sleep on the couch till the rain stopped.


   

[p.hanson]

The next night:  Maya slept in her sisters bed again, and was having one of her nightmares. Her mother was holding her against her will at knife-point, restraining her and covering her mouth. "You make one move, your gone" Said Michelle. Maya was paralized with fear, with the sensation of blood dripping down her face. "You promise not to move?"  Maya nodded her head, trying to hold back the tears. "Good, then this should be easy" Said Michelle, raising a handgun to her daughter's head. BANG!!
   Maya screamed herself awake in tears. "What in Hell?!" said Carrie, just being woken up by loud screaming. She saw her sister with her face all pale and she was crying. "Shhhh! Maya,  just relax". Said Carrie as she held her close. Maya was terrified, but calmed down when she felt Carrie's arm around her. She snuggled up next to her and buried her face under her arm. Carrie stayed with her all night.

The next day, at school: Maya was at her locker when a snotty girl named Sabrina started talking to her.  She looked at Maya's scars and asks "Are you a cutter or something?" feeling insulted and embarassed, she calmly answers 'No, I'm NOT".  "Isn't your sister a Bastard?" Asked Sabrina.  Maya glared at her. "Not that it's any of your business, but tecnically yes, she is! Anymore questions?!" With a smug look, the girl asks "Is it true that you killed your brother? Because that's pretty messed up. You should be locked up!"  Just then Maya had a flashback of her pushing him into the road and seeing him getting hit. And remembering almost passing out from the pain of her mom carving "I killed him" into her neck when she was 12. She could still feel the blood trickling down her back. Maya's face turned bright red. She lost it. She clenched her fist and gave a hard blow to the girls face.  After the blow, Maya bashed Sabrina's head against the wall. Then put her hands around her throat screaming "Come on! Fight back you you pathetic wh*re b*tch " In total shock and not able to breath, Sabrina tried pushing her off, seeing pure blood crudling hatred in Maya's eyes.  Sabrina started to feel light headed, and faint. She was just about to pass out. Maya couldn't control herself. All those years of her mom's harassment and violence, has finally got to her. Suddenly, somebody yanked her backwards by her shirt. She hit the tile floor flat on her back, HARD. Knocking the wind outta her for a few seconds. Before she knew what happened, she found herself being held down by the SRO  andthe principal. She was mad and freaking out at the same time. She tried to push them off, but they held her arms to the floor over her head. Her heart starts racing and she screams out of anger and fear, trying to free her hands. Seeing a teacher leading Sabrina to the nurses office, Maya roars "Go to Hell snake!" Baring her teeth. Still not able to break free, she couldn't help freaking out over the hand gun attached to Jeff's (the SRO's) belt. She started to shake her head from side to side. Suddenly in the corner of her eye, she saw Jason hovering over them. Suddenly, she felt a strange feeling of relief. To her, it was a pleasent sight. She didn't feel so scared anymore. She let out a sigh, and relaxed her arms, letting them control her. Understanding that she just surrendered, Jeff released her arms and helped her up. The principal lead her to her office. When they got there, Mrs. Lance made her sit across from her. Pointing a finger in Maya;s face, she yells "What were you thinking?! Did you think you could just randomly attack another student? You know what? We could have you expeled for violence here!! You better start talking right now!"  Maya just sat there lookin down and away, with her hair covering her face. "Do you hear me girl?! Are you Deaf?! Look at me!" Mrs. Lance yelled. Trying not to show her fear, Maya mumbled "She said I was a cutter and that I killed my brother". "And did you kill him?" Asked Mrs. Lance not too worried.  Maya nodded yes.  "What do you mean? Look at me!"  Yelled the principal, lifting up Maya's chin.
Maya got scared and snapped. "DON'T TOUCH ME!" She screamed. Swatting her hand away. She kicked her chair back and hurried for the door. Mrs, Lance grabbed her arm and blocked the door, backing Maya into the wall. She looked directly into her eyes, and said "Listen here! I don't care who you think you are! That was completely uncalled for! Look at this, not so big and tough now, huh?! I don't know what you're trying to pull, but you better speak up before I expel you!"

Breathing hard, Maya started to babble and studder. With Mrs. Lance pointing her finger up in her face, Maya couldn't help but envision her mom cornering her screamingand beating her. Her face turned pale, her pupils dialated, and she cries. By instinct, she grabbed onto Mrs. Lances hands to block them. Her back slowly slid down the wall. When her bottom hit the floor, she closes her eyes tight, and slowly protects her face. She starts shaking and wimpering. Finally realizing that she wasn't faking, Mrs. Lance kneels down in front of her. "Oh my gosh...What's going on??" She said in a calmer voice.  She gently pulled Maya's hands off of her sweaty and tear streaked face. She said "Everythings gonna be fine, okay? There's nothing to be afraid of in this room" The foundation on Maya's face was rubbed off, exposing a dark blue ring of bruise bellow her left eye. When Mrs. Lance asked her what happened to her eye, she couldn't even answer. She was still breathing fast and hard, and her eyes were rolling back. She felt chills, Thinking she's about to die. . She saw Mrs. Lance trying to put something over her face. She couldn't even focus.She started thrashing her head again. Mrs. Lance calmed her down and gently stroked the side of her head. She put the paper bag over her mouth, which finally slowed down her breathing. She could now focus a little better.  Mrs. Lance asked "Now what's going on with you?" Maya froze, she didn't wanna talk to her. "Come on now. Just tell me what's going on. You don't have to worry, it's just you and me here. You can tell me anything" Maya looked around the room, and started to speak up. "Momma and I don't get along" she mumbled. Mrs. Lance swallowed and closed her eyes for a second, and said "I see. Do you two fight often?" Maya nodded. Then Mrs. Lance asks "Has she ever hurt or struck you in any way?" Maya looked nervous again, looking down. "Come on,it's just us, like I said"
Mrs. Lance Gradually gained her trust, and was told everything. Then Maya's lips started to quiver. And she said "Do you know what it's like, to be held down by someone, and her holding a knife to your throat saying they wanna kill you? And you don't even know when they'll strike. But you know she means it, and you could feel her tense up, and can feel the cold blade touching your skin, you know it's close, and you can't control it" She was shaking at this point. "YOu gotta get me out of here. Please help me" almost crying, Mrs. Lance said "I can't. I'm not allowed to interfere. I'm so sorry." Maya's heart sunk a little bit. Then shouted "She's gonna kill me! Please...." She burried her face in Mrs. Lance's arms crying. "I don't wanna die any more.
   Mrs. Lance was competely shocked and almost crying at this point. "Maya, no matter what she told you, It's not your fault. It's a terrible thing, but it's not your fault".She said. "Then why does she do this?!"  Maya shouted. As Mrs. Lance was covering Maya's bad eye with make-up, she said "I'm gonna tell you a secret, okay? When I was a little younger than you, my dad beat me, just like what you go through"... After a lot of talking, Maya asked "When does the pain stop? My heart hurts so bad". Mrs. Lance answered "It doesn't, it never really goes away. But never forget, you are not her. And if that's how she's going to be, then you know your better than her".
   Before Maya left for class, Mrs. lance said "Hey, if you ever need anything, or just need someone to talk to, I'll always be here" Maya nodded her head and gave her a hug, not knowing if she would ever see her again. "Bye Mrs. Lance" She said. Mrs. Lance felt her skaking in her arms. She answered "Bye sweetie. Take care, okay? Everythings gonna be alright"
 

The Next Day: When Michelle's really high on Meth (which is usually the reason she takes her agressions out on Maya), she thinks she sees Justin (Maya's father) cheat on her.  So all she can think about is completely destroying him. So that night, she flushes her wedding ring, destroys all the pictures, and...

   That night: Enraged, Michelle grabbed Maya by the neck, restraining her against her sholder, with her fingers digging into the sides behind her jaw. Maya's head was tilted back, so her throat was completely exposed. Suddenly, in the corner of her eye, she saw something shiny in her mom's right hand. What she saw was the gleam of a huge kitchen knife. Michelle held it up to Maya's throat. "If you make one move, I swear to god your finished" said Michelle. Maya was frozen with fear and was starting to quiver uncontrolably. Her heart was pounding and she couldn't help but cry and whimper. Her worst nightmare was coming true.  All she could do was pray.  Then she felt an instant excruciating pain shooting through her body.  Maya let out a terrible cry of agony as her mother drove the knife into her little body right below the ribs.  After her mom released her grip, she was so weak  from the pain that she collapsed to her knees.  Michelle then grabbed her by her arm and pulled her up on her feet.  Then threw her into the TV stand. Upon impact, Maya smashed the little glass cover for the TV. The shattered glass left a deep cut above her eye. Now helpless sitting in the corner, Maya let out another yelp as Michelle kicked her in her side, snapping one of her ribs.  "That's right.  Sweet dreams Angel".  Michelle sneered with a malicious look in her eyes.  Maya could barely hear her. She felt so light-headed, and all she could think about was the pain and the thick, metalic taste of blood trickling out of her mouth and down her chin.  It hurt so much that she couldn't even see straight. "Well, look on the bright side. At least no one will have to look at that pathetic little face of yours".  Said Michelle.  Maya looked up at her, too scared to say a word.  But in her eyes, she was asking "Why?".

   Michelle looked down at Maya and saw the blood.  Enjoying every second of her daughter's misery, she threw an old towel at her saying "Don't get that nasty sh*t on my carpet!" Michelle started to leave. Oddly enough, Maya couldn’t bear to see her leave. "Wait, stop!" She called. "What?!" Michelle snapped. A little more calmly, she asked "What?" After a long pause, Maya says, "Hold me momma"  Satisfied with this whole thing, Michelle left, slamming the door behind her. When she got in her car, she got out her phone and sent Justin a text message that said "How stupid do you think I am? I saw what you did. By the way, I hope you enjoy the little suprise I left ya...Sweet-Face".  When she got to the bar, people noticed blood on her shirt. When someone asked about it, she smiled and answered "I got rid of a discusting little "rat" thats been living in my house".
 
   Meanwhile, after hearing more screaming and smashing than usual, Carrie was starting to wonder what the heck was going on.  She came downstairs in a huff from being woken up.  When she walked in the living room, she saw her little sister lying on the floor.  Maya was on her side facing the other way, but Carrie could hear her crying about something.  She wasn't really suprised because it was kind of a constant thing to find her alone crying after a fight with mom. But carrie was starting to get worried because Maya wasn't breathing right. It was really fast and choppy.  So she asked, "You alright Maya?  What's going on?" Not getting an answer, Carrie walked a little closer.  When she got there, she saw blood all over her sister's hands and body.  "Oh my God! What happend?!"  She yells.  But then she saw the pain and fear in Maya's eyes, so Carrie kneeled down next to her and calmly asked "Who did this?"  Almost at a whisper, Maya answers "It was Mom.  Please don't let her come back".  Carrie was speechless. She didn't think it would ever go this far. 
      For Maya, it was torture to even breathe.  Every breath was like a gunshot.  And no matter how much she tried, she couldn't stop the bleeding.  And aside from the pain, she was Scared to death.  Not only of what just happend, but also of her mom coming back and finishing her off, or even hurt Carrie.
      Carrie helped Maya sit up and let her lay against her.  "Carrie I'm so scared, please don't leave me". Cried Maya as she tightly wrapped her arms around her too terrified to let go, getting blood all over her sister's shirt.  "It's okay, just relax. I'm hear." Carrie whispered to Maya, gently rubbing her on the back. She took the towel off the floor and wiped the blood off Maya's mouth. Carrie was trying so hard to be strong and not cry in front of her, she didn't want to upset her any more than she already was.  She held Maya close, looked into her gentle eyes and said "Everything's gonna be alright, your safe now".  Then Maya asks "Carrie, what did I do? Why did she do this?" Carrie answers: "You didn't do anything wrong. She's sick as Hell". Maya finally calmed down. After a long pause, she asked "Will you remember me? You know, as family?" Carries eyes were filling up with tears and she felt like she got kicked in the throat. She couldn't stand seeing her baby sister in such pain. She nodded her head and answered "Always". To prove it, she took a silver bracelet out of her pocket and clipped it onto Maya's wrist and held her delicate hand. "I know it's a week early, but Happy Birthday".  Then Carrie whispered something in her ear. Maya smiled and started to cry again.  She rested her head on her big sister's chest, giving her the last ounce of trust she had.  The sound of Carrie's heartbeat and her kind words made her feel safe.  No words can expain the peace that came over them at that moment.  She was in the arms of her guardian angel.  She was now lethargic and confused, all she wanted to do is fall asleep. Then everything started to fade to black, so she closed her eyes and thinks to herself "So I guess this is when the pain stops...finally".  She muttered a sigh of relief as all her pain just suddenly disappeared...it was the last breath that she ever took.  She died, right in Carrie's arms.

       Noticing how quiet and motionless Maya suddenly became, Carrie gently shakes her sister's sholder.  "Maya, stay with me now.  Maya!" No response.  "Goddammit Maya, talk to me!"  She yells as she continues shaking her sholder.  Tears start running down her face.  "Please girl, you gotta wake up.  Your gonna be okay".  She begs as she combs her fingers through Maya's soft brown hair. 
   Carrie heard a siren and saw flashing blue and red lights out the window. Followed by someone pounding on the door. Someone heard smashing and agonizing screams and called the police. When a man came in, he saw everything. "Oh my god, what the Hell happened here?" he said. Carrie looked at him, unsure of what he'd do. "For god's sake, please help her" She pleaded.  He kneeled down next to her to see what he could do. He called the paramedics for help... After alot of effort, they had a look of failure on their faces. One of them looked at Carrie and said "I'm sorry, but it's too late. She's gone". While preparing the truck, one of them asked Carrie "You need a minute alone?" Still crying, Carrie nodded.
   She looked down at her, supporting her head.  "I'm...I'm so sorry...about everything.  Everything I've ever said or done to you.  And I'm sorry I didn't stop her.  Your a good girl, and I love you. I'm gonna miss you so much. Rest in peace sweet heart". She said as she gave her best friend a kiss on the head goodbye, then just held her for awhile.  Then one of the guys came and picked up her baby sister's lifeless body. "Man, poor kid". the guy muttered.
Even though she was only 15, Maya didn't mind being dead.  She's in god's hands now, where she can get all the love in the world and nobody can ever hurt her again. She was free at last.
Two days later: On monday morning, while Maya's home room class was waiting for the teacher, the principal Mrs. Lance came in. Her face looked like she's been crying. She said "Can I please have your attention?" Everyone quieted down. "There's been a murder in our area. We are very hurt to tell you that a sophmore at our school, Maya Saunders has been killed Saturday night..."

Her familly buried her right next to her brother.
 
5 days later later: Carrie kneels down next to brother's and sister's grave. And for the first time in a long time, she prayed.  "I Know I'm probably not your favorite person to answer, but please take care of them.  They never asked for this and deserved so much better."  She stayed for a little while longer. Before she left, next to her stone, she set some lilies and a card that she knew her sister would never read."
On the front of the card was a picture of Maya at 6 years old riding the old pony they had. On the inside it read:  "To my shinin' light,  you're an incredible person and will  be cherished forever in my heart.  I'll never forget you. Happy Birthday" 
-Carrie  Saunders
She would've turned 16 that day.
Awile after that: Carrie was at trial against her mother... [/center]

Michelle's Lawyer: (talking about Carrie) "So, let's get this strait. We are are supposed to believe that this pothead sl*t didn't kill this child? You'd think she would call 911? No!"

Carrie: "Shut up! I couldn't, mom cut the phone line!"

Judge: "Carrie, what makes you think that Michelle is responsible for the death of her child?"

Carrie:"She was always like that to her! If she wasn't holding a knife to her throat, she was smacking and kicking her. And the poor girl was mentally heart-broken. Once, I found a whole bottle of sleeping pills under her matress"

Judge:(Looking at Michelle) "Is this true?"...
*Awile later*

Michelle:"All I did was put the girl out of her misery"

Judge:"Put her out of her misery? Michelle, you tortured her to death"

Michelle:"F*ck you! I didn't torture her!"

Judge:"Watch your mouth!! You stabbed her, you kicked her while she was still barely alive, then you left her there to die! Lucky Carrie was there to make it bearable!"

Michelle:"I am not in the wrong your honor. That girl was a murderer. She killed my son!"

Carrie:"let it go, she Was four! You know thay were just playing! She's dead anyways. What more could she do?"...


Judge:(watching Michelle look at the crime scene photos) "I hope you realize that's your baby in those pictures. Two of your kids are now dead"

Michelle:(starting to cry)"Oh my God"

Judge:"Did you love her"

Michelle:"Yes, I've always loved her"

Judge:"Riiiight. Do you regret what you did?"

Michelle:"No your honor"

Judge:"Oh yea, your a real fine piece of work, arent ya?! So, you think that you'll go out and say: My son was killed by a DRUNK DRIVER, and for that, I tortured and killed my 15 year old daughter. That's Sick!  I honestly don't know what to do with you"

She was voted guilty.  25 years without parole.

So, for something that Justin might have done, Maya had to suffer for it.
After watching her little sister die miserably because of mere jealousy and hatred, Carrie realizes how horrible the choices she was making were. Mom made the same ones, and all her emotions got to her and ended up taking her daughter's life away.

About two months later,  Carrie's relationship with her step father (Justin) was starting to get better, and she started going to church with him.  The same place where him and Maya used to go. They remembered watching her sing hymns in the choir and praying with the pastor.  And what did Carrie whisper to her sister?  Maya was an Aunt-to-be.


Some time after that, Carrie made a promise to herself to start making better choices so the same thing doesn't happen to her own child.

Kevin Jay Saunders    Maya Julie Saunders
Oct.21 1990-May10 1996   Nov.29 1992 - Nov.22 2008   
"Sadness is sometimes the best way to know what true happiness is"                                                                                                           

Carrie: They say losing someone you're close to is hard. But burying the best friend you've ever had, that was the worst day of my life.
                   

   So this is to you Mom.  You brain washed me, you battered me, and you hurt my heart. You killed me, you've won the war. But, I know, at this point, I was never good enough for you.  And yet, I still love you. I'm so sorry Momma, I didn't mean to kill him.
-Maya

[p.hanson]

in my book this kid his name is john has just seen his family killed on the street...based on real life

I soooo want to read that!!!