Blu-ray Review: 'Mega Python Vs. Gatoroid'
Up for a little 80’s revival complete with two girl hair pulling, name calling and a full-on food fight? (Oh, and there's some monsters too!) Then come along for the world tour as we check out the former singing icon laced flick "Mega Python Vs. Gatoroid" (now available from Image Entertainment) featuring Tiffany and Debbie Gibson – see the lyrics below!
Title: "Mega Python Vs. Gatroid"
Cast: Tiffany, Debbie Gibson, A. Martinez
Director: Mary Lambert
Rating: Not Rated
Runtime: 91 minutes
Release Company: Image Entertainment
The Flick: Some describe this as a B-movie, but it’s more like a C (for the ample cleavage constantly displayed by former 80’s pop star Tiffany in every shot!) or D (for the disturbing non-acting prowess of 80’s singing icon Debbie Gibson!) for the movie moron crowd. How the once great Mary Lambert, the lady behind memorable works like "Pet Sematary" and the unforgettable "Tales From The Crypt" episode Collection Completed, got saddled and then boldly put her name on such a tedious excuse for a piece of cinema is the E! True Hollywood story I would really like to see. The story is even inane - giant pythons released by environmentalist Gibson that are counteracted and confronted by equally large gators that are fed steroid injected chickens by law lady Tiffany. Add to that some very atrocious and shameful acting via A. Martinez as the local animal expert (he makes the bad gals look accomplished!) and some very cheesy looking CGI effects that my kid can do on his laptop and you’ve got a laughable outing void of any watchability or even a mild by accident gnarly factor.
Best Feature: There is a Making of featurette that shows how excited Tiffany and Gibson are…and how more experienced folks like Lambert and Martinez seem to not be.
Best Hidden Gem: Besides Micky Dolenz showing up to complete the forgotten singers trifecta, it’s the hair pulling, body parts exposing, food in face flying catfight between Tiff and Deb – the ONLY reason this horrible project gets its half star. (That and the line "Someone had bitch for breakfast!")
Worth the Moola: Maybe fans of the two now older music giants get joy out of seeing the gals, surrounded by appalling looking "monsters", mock themselves (about the bad gators – "I think we’re alone now!" followed by "Yeah, there doesn’t seem to be anyone around!"), but I’m not laughing. Yes, I can appreciate pure escapism, but not when I’m the one with the urge to escape. To quote another 80’s staple Huey Lewis, sometimes bad is bad.