Eight hours into ''Grand Theft Auto IV'' (Rockstar Games, for the Xbox 360, PlayStation 3, $59.99), I've stolen 17 cars, run over 20 people and killed another 15 (some of whom had it coming). I've shaken down a couple of store owners and beaten up an old lady. I've driven while drunk and, perhaps worse, while talking on a cell phone.

As a fantasy-loving nerd who came of age in the '80s, I was fascinated by the role-playing game ''Dungeons & Dragons.'' Fortunately, I didn't know anyone else who cared, so I didn't get drawn into the cult. But I've been a sucker ever since for the electronic games that were inspired by it, from 1981's ''Wizardry'' to the ongoing ''Final Fantasy'' series.

If you've ever been in an automobile accident, even a minor one, you know there are few noises more sickening than the sound of metal crunching against metal. No matter how bad a day you've been having, that noise means it just got a whole lot worse.