Seinfeld Episode Guides
Episodes:
The Cartoon
Elaine is fixated on a New Yorker cartoon that doesn't make sense to her so she starts cartooning herself, even though it's a Ziggy ripoff. Jerry angers a fellow comedienne by saying she should leave the business, so in response she writes a one woman show about how Jerry is the devil. George wonders why he is dating his current girlfriend and starts to worry when he realizes that she looks like Jerry. Kramer decides to stop talking.
The Dealership
Jerry is excited when Puddy gets promoted to car salesman at the dealership as he is looking for a good deal on a new car, but when Elaine breaks up with Puddy again, Jerry sees his advantage disappear. While waiting for Jerry, George has an altercation with a vending machine when he can't get the candy bar out of it. Kramer decides to take one of the cars for a test drive and see how far it can actually go on an empty tank.
The Clip Show (Part 1)
The gang plan to go to a movie but before they go, Jerry takes the time to look at nine years of memories.
The Butter Shave
Jerry is elated that NBC is once again expressing interest in his pilot 'about nothing' however he is annoyed that his comic nemesis Kenny Bania is experiencing success by always following him. Kramer discovers that he likes butter as a shaving cream but starts to use it on more of his body than just his face. George scores a new job by continuing to use his cane and benefit from his handicap status. Meanwhile, Elaine has a nightmare return trip from a vacation in Europe with Puddy.
The Frogger
George and Jerry discover that George still has the high score on a 'Frogger' machine at a pizza place they used to frequent during high school. Learning that the pizza place is closing down, George tries to figure a way to move the Frogger machine to his place without losing power and the high score resetting. Jerry has a new girlfriend who always finishes his sentences so he wants to break up with her but changes his mind when news of a serial killer spooks him. Elaine is overwhelmed by how frequently she has to eat cake at work and ultimately eats the wrong piece of cake that is dear to Peterman.
The Betrayal
The gang's trip to India for Sue Ellen's wedding is told from the end of the story to the beginning, ie. backwards. Kramer stays behind in New York to 'out wish' a friend who wants him to drop dead.
The Maid
Jerry hires a maid to clean his apartment but when they start dating and her visits to the apartment have nothing to do with cleaning, she still demands the money for her 'services'. Elaine changes her phone number as she keeps getting too many calls from fax machines but her new number is that of a recently deceased woman, bringing with it a whole new host of problems. Meanwhile, Kramer considers his relationship long distance as his girlfriend moved downtown and George tries to find a cool new nickname for himself at work.
The Apology
George is obsessed with getting an apology from an acquaintance going through the Alcoholics Anonymous program. Elaine goes head to head with a germaphobic co-worker and Jerry starts dating a nudist- learning the difference between 'good naked and bad naked'. Kramer decides to put a garbage disposal in his bathtub to curtail is shower usage.
The Burning
Jerry is intrigued and upset when he finds out his new girlfriend has a 'tractor story' that she won't tell him. George tries to end every conversation at a meeting on a 'high note' and leave the other person wanting more. Kramer and Mickey get a job acting out illnesses and injuries at medical school and end up catching something. Elaine discovers that Puddy is religious and doesn't care about her 'soul'.
The Voice
Jerry and the gang start using a booming voice that mimics the noises Jerry's new girlfriend's stomach makes, however when she discovers this fact she gives him an ultimatum. Elaine has a hard time breaking up with Puddy as every time she does she ends up in bed with him. George's boss finds out that George is not actually handicapped and Kramer hires an intern to help him better manage his time.
The Blood
Jerry's parents hire an old friend to train Jerry as they are worried that he has started to gain weight. Jerry also has an accident with a knife and ends up requiring an infusion of blood, which happens to belong to Kramer. Jerry is not excited about becoming 'blood brothers'. Meanwhile, George thinks that his 'performance in the bedroom' is improving because of vanilla scented incense so he starts incorporating food and television to further improve his performance. Elaine visits a friend who implies that Elaine isn't responsible enough to watch over her child, so Elaine works over time to prove otherwise.
The Finale (Part 2)
The gang is put on trial for not assisting the car jacking victim, thus violating the Good Samaritan law. A lengthy trial ensues where many characters from past shows are brought in as character witnesses to recount the gang's tendency for selfish acts. Jerry, Kramer, Elaine and George are all sentenced to a year in jail to reflect on their past conduct. Nothing much changes as minutiae is still obsessed over and Jerry starts his stand-up routines again.
The Junk Mail
Kramer plans a revenge scheme on a mail order catalogue company as pay back for all the unwanted catalogues he receives. Jerry gets a car from an old friend as payment for one of his performances but the car he gets isn't the one he wanted. Elaine breaks up with Puddy and starts dating a new guy who does TV spots for an electronics store. George finds out that his parents want to distance themselves from him when he makes his weekly phone call to them.
The Reverse Peephole
Kramer and Newman decide to change the peepholes on their front doors so they can see if there is anyone inside before they enter. The gang and Puddy are invited to a friend's apartment warming party where Puddy wears a fur coat. Elaine throws the coat out of the window where it is found later the next day by Newman and Kramer, hanging on a tree. Meanwhile back at the apartment, Newman admits to Kramer that he is sleeping with the landlord's wife and has given her the coat. Jerry has a new girlfriend who makes him carry all of her stuff so he complains to Elaine, who in turn tells Jerry about the 'men's carryall' that Peterman used to wear. George has issues with his oversized wallet and the massage chair that the gang went in on for the housewarming gift.
The Wizard
Jerry gives his father an expensive handheld organizer for his birthday but all Morty thinks it's good for is calculating tips. Jerry and George debate the race of Elaine's new boyfriend and Elaine is intrigued as she didn't think he was of a different race than her. George has to deal with the Rosses and has to lie repeatedly as to why he can't attend a fancy function put on by The Foundation. Those lies come back to haunt him. Kramer decides to retire as he starts receiving royalties from his coffee table book about coffee tables and Hollywood is interested in buying the rights.
The Clip Show (Part 2)
Jerry continues to reflect on the past nine years of the gang's life. More clips and even a series of bloopers are shown.
The Strongbox
After a string of robberies in the building, Kramer buys a strong box to keep his valuables safe in, but Jerry keeps finding the keys. Jerry, also reacting to the robberies, doesn't let someone into the building, but ultimately finds out that the man is a neighbor. George tries unsuccessfully to break up with his girlfriend and Elaine starts dating a mysterious man who she thinks is either married or a superhero.
The Puerto Rican Day
When the gang leave the Mets game early, they get caught in the Puerto Rican Day Parade. With traffic at a standstill, they each take a different approach to getting home: Jerry and Kramer stay in the car but are thwarted by a maroon VW golf, Elaine hails a cab but then abandons it as she is desperate to get home for '60 Minutes' and George heads to a movie and has an altercation with a guy using a laser pointer. Kramer ends the day by mistakenly setting the Puerto Rican flag on fire.
The Bookstore
Jerry is upset when he catches his Uncle Leo shoplifting at a bookstore, though Uncle Leo thinks it's his right as a 'senior citizen'. George is furious when he is forced to buy a big book after he takes it into the store's bathroom to peruse. Kramer and Newman endeavor to open a rickshaw service and Elaine attempts to avoid being labeled an 'office skank' by pretending to date the co-worker she made out with at a party.
The Slicer
Kramer buys a meat slicer as he is unsatisfied with the quality of his commercially cut meats. Elaine is driven crazy by her vacationing neighbor's alarm clock that he never switched off before leaving so she enlists Kramer to blow the fuses to his apartment but in doing so finds out that the neighbor has a cat being fed by an electric automatic feeder. Kramer uses his meat slicer to help feed the cat. Meanwhile, Jerry is dating a dermatologist who he feels puts him down for 'not saving lives'. George has a new job but realizes that his boss had a nasty altercation with him years earlier so rushes to airbrush the photo that shows the evidence.
The Merv Giffin Show
Kramer finds the old Merv Griffin Show set in a dumpster and promptly sets it up in his living room. He starts treating his life like a talk show. Elaine has to deal with a new co-worker who keeps 'sidling' up to her when she least expects it and George's new girlfriend makes him take care of a squirrel that he's ran over. Meanwhile Jerry's new girlfriend has an amazing toy collection but won't let Jerry touch it.
The Strike
Kramer announces that his 12 year strike from working at H&H Bagels is coming to an end. The minimum wage increase is enough to satisfy his financial needs. Elaine loses out on a free sub sandwich when she writes a fake phone number down on the card after 'denim vest' hits on her. Jerry starts dating a woman who only looks beautiful in certain light so he calls her 'two-faced' and George tries to give away fake donation cards as Christmas gifts at work. Meanwhile, George's father revives Festivus, a Christmas Hanukkah joint holiday he created years ago.
The Finale (Part 1)
Jerry and George finally strike a deal with NBC to produce their sitcom and in advance of having to move to LA, they gather the gang for a 'last hurrah' vacation to Paris on NBC's jet. Kramer, however, causes engine problems and the jet is forced to land in a small town in Michigan, but not before Elaine and George spill some secrets thinking they are going to crash. While waiting for the plane to be fixed, the gang witnesses a car jacking but does nothing to help the victim. They are arrested for doing 'nothing'.
The Serenity Now
George's father uses the phrase 'serenity now' every time his blood pressure rises. This doesn't stop him from hiring George to sell computers for him and compete in sales with his old nemesis. Jerry's new girlfriend helps him release his emotions and Kramer remodels the front of his apartment which causes him trouble with the 'neighborhood children'. Meanwhile, Elaine has some problems at a Bar Mitzvah when she suddenly becomes desirable to all Jewish men.
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