In Blood for Dracula, our favorite Transylvanian Count (Udo Kier) isn’t doing too well. It seems that Romania’s young ladies have been playing it a bit too fast and loose for the Count’s specific taste for the pure blood of virgins--or rather “wir-gins,” as the Count says. As he grows increasingly sick, Dracula packs up his coffin and heads off to the one place in the world that should be just brimming with pure young maidens: Italy. Good luck with that one, Count.

After producing the awesome Frankenstein blood-and-sex-fest send-up Andy Warhol’s Flesh for Frankenstein (Warhol, incidentally...