Stephen Colbert Twitter
StephenAtHome Followers: 3,473,854Location:
Bio:
A study predicts nearly half of all Americans will be obese by 2030. But with a little American ingenuity I bet we can get there by 2025!
Posted at: Sun May 13 18:19:22
At Bank Street Bookstore, signing "I am a Pole." If you missed it, I signed a bunch of extra copies. Go get 'em! http://t.co/P2zmEfjk
Posted at: Sat May 12 15:25:43
I'm going on break for 2 weeks. Which, for no reason, is the exact recuperation time for ankle lipo and a forehead scrape.
Posted at: Fri May 11 15:13:24
Happy Mothers Day! That's right, I care about my mom so much I start Tweeting to her early.
Posted at: Fri May 11 03:38:06
What an historic day! I'm talking, of course, about how I finally got all ten punches on my Pinkberry card! Free yogurt, your time is now!
Posted at: Thu May 10 01:53:18
I'll be signing copies of "I Am A Pole" @bankstreetbooks in NYC on 5-12-12. Why not celebrate by buying 51212 copies? http://t.co/jLEts7kh
Posted at: Thu May 10 00:15:27
A Nebraska man changed his name to Tyrannosaurus Rex. I guess he couldn't get show business work with his old name, Tyrannosaurus Rexbowitz.
Posted at: Wed May 09 17:19:26
Amazon is now selling designer fashion. Which couture dress would look best on my Kindle?
Posted at: Wed May 09 14:12:20
Buy my children's book "I am a Pole (And So Can You!)" or I'll have to assume you hate children. http://t.co/PKj2PrNh
Posted at: Wed May 09 03:47:19
A Socialist has been elected the president of France. I guess Obama got a night job.
Posted at: Tue May 08 15:12:28
Buy my children's book I AM A POLE (AND SO CAN YOU) about a pole figuring just where he fits in. (Spoiler Alert: The answer is America!)
Posted at: Tue May 08 03:59:16
Our teens are getting drunk on Purell. But to be fair, it tastes better than Jagermeister.
Posted at: Tue May 08 03:37:15
Fell in the bathroom and hit my head today. Ambulance showed up before I could invent a flux capacitor. Will try again tomorrow.
Posted at: Sun May 06 22:32:31
Help settle a bet - a brunch after 11am is technically a "blunch," right?
Posted at: Sat May 05 16:09:26
Does anyone know how to get a set of car keys out of a garbage disposal? And also a car? I had some trouble pulling into the garage.
Posted at: Fri May 04 23:39:22
Just reading the paper. A lot of stirring articles today: "the""an""a." Fascinating.
Posted at: Fri May 04 13:30:48
I just figured out a great way to dry my hair in the morning: salad spinner.
Posted at: Fri May 04 12:43:24
Jay the Intern beat me to the green room today, so I was the 2nd person to meet @TheRealBuzz Aldrin. I guess that's still pretty good.
Posted at: Fri May 04 02:02:32
Catch me on The Today Show tomorrow at 7 a.m.! I won’t be up yet, so somebody please let me know how I did.
Posted at: Fri May 04 00:16:40
Met this guy today. He asked me for some grey poupon. http://t.co/rMteef10
Posted at: Thu May 03 20:20:04
Browse More Actors:
